Mystery Gifts and Family

Several years ago, my sister Jackie sister-in-law Terre started a family tradition.

The mystery gift. For those of you that may happen by and don't know what this is, I'll give a brief explanation:

The gift is a mystery because its contents is unknown to everyone, except the giver of course. Anyone playing the game can shake, sniff, jiggle, listen, weigh, bounce or do whatever short of opening the package, to get a "feel" for what's inside. Then that person may ask one yes or no question about the contents and the giver will answer. Play then passes to the next person and they ask their question and so on. Over time the clues begin to add up as to what the gift might be and a player will make a guess of the contents. If they are correct, then they get to keep the gift and they are required to bring the mystery gift next year.

Over the years our family has had gifts with historical family meaning, we've had silly gifts, handmade gifts and gifts from other countries. One year my nephew recycled a wedding gift, one year it was frozen steaks, (the package was cold and wasn't that interesting), one year it was canned Echidna, an animal native to Australia, (stuffed animal not real but canned nonetheless). Sometimes the packaging was "normal" and would help give clues to the gift. Most of the time the packaging was very misleading and would lead in wild directions. The canned Echidna for instance was held down tight in the center of a big box, it was lightweight and made no noise, however, the handful of gravel in the box around it made a lot of noise and added weight. One year the gift was a kite. A very large kite. The mystery gift box, however, was a shirt box. With a kite shaped piece of felt inside and taped down. No weight, no movement and very small. This year's gift was packed in rice so that it wouldn't make any noise (the jingling of the bells would have been a giveaway otherwise). I think each family represented at our christmases have won at least once, but I know not every individual has won. Some have won it more than once. I don't think mom ever got one, which is too bad because I know that she would have been very creative picking one out the next year. Or making it, it probably would have been handmade. Dad always knew what the gift was. At least that is what he said every year. He'd watch for a few guesses and announce that he knew what it was, and someone would say, "Tell us what it is." Then dad would laugh and say he didn't want to spoil it for everybody else and go on his way.

This year christmas was different. If you read the blog at all you already know this. This year we met at my sister Sheila's house for dinner. No gift exchange this year, but dinner with family was nice, and time spent together is the best gift of all. We are trying to figure out what our new traditions might be. One tradition that we didn't let go was the mystery gift. This year it was Sheila's turn to supply the gift, but I brought one too. When she called to ask me to dinner I ran my idea by her to see if it would fly. I later talked to my brother and decided it was a "go." I purchased a ring for Tandy and wrapped it. The box it was in was stocking shaped and bigger than a normal ring box, but other than that I made no attempt to disguise it. I let everyone in on it, or tried to, I assumed one or two had already heard about it and didn't tell and I should have. But overall most everyone in the room knew what was in the box. Except Tandy.

By the time it was her turn to guess, there was little doubt about the contents. Can you wear it? Yes. Is it jewelry? Yes. Is it a necklace? No. Is it worn for a special occasion? Yes.

"Is it what I think it is? Tandy asked me. I said I don't know, you'll have to make a guess. She said, "It can't be, but I think it's a ring." I said, "If I told you it was a ring, and I asked you to marry me, would you wear it?

Sheila's gift was jingle bells. Very much like the ones that hung on mom's back door for years and years. Audrey will be bringing next year's mystery gift, I'm already looking forward to it. Sheila had bells for everyone, I got mine in a gift bag that mom had handmade and I had to give the bag back. It's ok, I have my own. And so this christmas had a little bit of everything.

Good food, family time, thoughts of mom and dad and family out of town. All in all it was a good day. Different but good. One small thing happened though that made a good day into a great day......

She said, "Yes, I will wear your ring."

Craig

P.S. Huge thanks to everyone for their "guesses", she thought it was great fun and she'll never forget it.

For Tandy

We met one year ago today. It was at the year-end worship service at Edmond. I remember how nervous I was and thinking you were a lot shorter than I had thought you were. So I managed to mumble a few words, I don't think it even qualified as small talk and asked if I could call you sometime. Sure you said, but then you didn't answer your phone for 4 days because it was broken. I didn't know that of course and so I thought that you had decided to pass on me and I was ready to give up. That's when you called me. It was easier to talk to you then I guess because we weren't face to face and we talked for almost an hour. I remember I was going somewhere and the kids kept bugging me to get off the phone. That was one year ago.

It's been quite a year sweetheart, hasn't it? Trying to get to know each other, both still recovering from divorces, learning how to be good friends, best of friends. In the middle of this we spent two months at the hospital with mom, sat through 3 funerals of close family members together, and dealt with the ugliness of jealous people (also family). You learned that worship can be very emotional for me, especially during certain songs or scriptures. We learned how to help each other heal, how to comfort one another. That's what good friends do. And we learned to love each other.

Our relationship grew and so did our feelings for one another. One constant this year, one good thing all year, was you. I often go to bed thinking of you, and begin the next day thinking of you as I wake. Your smile, your desire to study God's word, your eagerness to help or to do for someone else, your laugh. The way you care about and care for my children as if they were your own. You are beautiful on the inside as well as the outside. These are just some of the things that I love about you. I don't know what God has given us; 20 days, or 20 years or more, I just know that I want to share them with you.

It was one year ago today we met. I had no idea then that I would one day ask you to be my wife, and that you would say yes.

I Love You,

Craig

Not-so Melancholidays

Up and down days this holiday season, but the last few days have been pretty good. Christmas, as predicted, was different this year. Filled with a longing for some folks now gone, but it was not a sad christmas. After all, I got to spend time with a good portion of the people that I love the most in this world. We ate too much, we laughed together, we talked and played the "what did you get for....." game. We had Richard's chewy pecan pie, and about 15 other wonderful desserts. It was a good day. Oh, and I asked my girl to be my wife, and she said yes. Wonderful! More details on that in a forthcoming blog (with pictures). It helped a lot I think, I was so busy trying to get everything done for work and for christmas, I just didn't have time to be awash in sadness. Here are the last few days in pictures:

We had our holiday dinner at Search. Smoked ribs, pork loin and the other two major food groups; potatoes and dessert. Yummy!!

We also played dirty Santa this year again. Here is a picture of Jerry Campbell getting yet another quality gift in the exchange. Last year it was a miniature disco ball that he got stuck with. Some guys have all the luck.

This is my Search family, (and a few guests), Mark is taking this picture, so he's not seen, but that's all the staff, Tandy, and a couple of volunteers.

Jeff is taking band this year for the first time and playing the cornet. His first concert was on the 18th and he did very well. The only good shot I could get was from the balcony before they started, but that's my boy there, the good looking kid in the white shirt.

Christmas morning at my house was fun. Tandy and Elizabeth came over about 8:00 and we did stockings and then opened gifts. The kids got to come home on Sunday night so they were there too and eager to get started. The jolly fat one left a lot of stuff for the kids to discover and there was a big mess afterward. A lot of fun.

Jack got an MP3 player, Amanda a camera and Jeff scored a DS lite. Woo Hoo!

Tandy and Elizabeth played with the Magnetix, (pretty neat toy) and we all recovered from the present unwrapping frenzy. What a mess! After an hour or so of recovery and play time, we headed off to Sheila's house for dinner and the "mystery gift"...........

Stay tuned there's more to come,

Craig

As Opposed to Good Crack.....

Funniest dumb criminal story I've read in a while. From the AP wire (foxnews.com):

http://www.foxnews.com/wires/2006Dec18/0,4670,BadCrack,00.html

Lady gets a bad rock. (There's a good rock?) Is so distraught by the substandard goods she has purchased she seeks restitution at the nearest local complaint department officer (deputy sheriff). Takes the rock out of her mouth to show him its bad cocaine. Brilliant!!

Perhaps when she gets out she'll only buy from certified rock dealers. Maybe, maybe not, there's a reason they are called crackheads.

OK, back to work.

Nice to be Reminded....

In the midst of the turmoil and struggles detailed in the last post, I was gently reminded yesterday of who I am and where I came from. The reason these memories are so powerful and intense is because the people behind the memories were themselves a powerful influence on my life. And they were just plain good folks. Simple as that. I mean, no one has fond memories of a scoundrel, do they?

Well, I'll start with Friday night which started out well, but ended poorly. Some kind of 24 hour stomach bug that just made the whole night miserable. My sister called Saturday afternoon and said the gang was going to get together and make christmas candy at my brother's house. This is kind of a new "tradition" with us, (is 2 years a tradition?), and I hated to miss it, but food was the last item of interest to me Saturday. It was also my youngest son's birthday and we didn't get to do what we had planned since I was in bed all day long recovering. Just kind of a downer day.

Feeling mostly better Sunday morning, but running a little behind, we got ourselves to church. As usual there were a couple of gentlemen at the door greeting and handing out the day's announcement sheets. I know one of the men fairly well, but I didn't know the other man's name, (I do now). As is my custom I stood there for a minute or two and greeted some folks and waited for Tandy to arrive. That's when nostalgia and memory and heritage and longing for the past were all handed to me. That's when this man, whose name is Bob Reed, leaned a little closer to me, (I had no idea he knew who I was), and said, "I still have an airplane that your father made, you know the ones, he made them out of wire. It's a Jet Commander. Your father was a good man and there just aren't many like him around anymore. Our generation is a dying breed."

I prepared myself for the flood of emotions that strangely didn't come. I found myself wishing I had my brother's ability to recall names and dates, who dad flew with, where he worked and with whom. I settled for a few moments of conversation with someone from the great "older" generation, someone who didn't grow up with all of these luxuries that we take for granted, who saw the depression, lived through a world war, lived without electric lights and indoor plumbing. Someone that knew my father. And like so many others that I have met and talked to, Mr. Reed held dad in very high regard. "He was a good man, I was proud to know him."

Thank you for the reminder Mr. Reed, and for the memories.

I can't count how many times I've heard; your dad was a man of his word, he was a good ol' boy, not many around that could fix 'em or fly 'em like your dad.........your father was a good christian man.

I just hope that I can live up to the name, but I know I'll always be proud to be called......

Jack Dodgen's son,
Craig

Summer Storm

Funny thing about storms, they can pop up suddenly, they can be brief or last for a while, they can be torrential or very mild. Usually though, you can sense them coming. The changing of the quality of light before a storm, the gathering of the clouds, the change in temperature, the scent of rain on the horizon, and let's not forget the change in pressure. Sadness and grief fit this pattern too. I have pictures that I took at mom's house the day she passed away. Some of the family were standing outside in the front yard watching a fairly large summer storm roll in. I have vivid memories of that gathering.

There's a storm on the horizon, the pressure's been building up for some time now, I can't yet tell what the intensity will be, but there have been a couple of rather intense squalls in the last few days.

My niece Audrey had this to say in a recent blog: (thoughts on sadness)

I read somewhere that grief doesn't need to be healed. It is, itself, the healing. Furthermore, it's not something you get over. It's something you get through. And the grief may subside, but the sadness will be there forever. You will never not miss the people you've lost.

Pretty sharp kiddo, pretty sharp. I don't know exactly how long, I can say in the last 38 years, but perhaps in as long as 55 years this is the first christmas that won't be at "home". It hasn't always been the same, and we haven't been able to get everybody together every year, and for that reason; over the years each christmas has been a little bit different from the last. I don't think that I have the words to describe it but if you are part of this family you understand what I mean by the word "home". And I think you'll understand what I mean when I say christmas won't be at "home" this year. Every home has a foundation, and this one is particulary strong. The foundation still exists, but the builders of the foundation have moved on to bigger and better things. Mom and Dad, having taught us what "home" really means, have gone on to their Heavenly home.

There's a storm on the horizon. These are the clouds that make up that storm: christmas, home, mom and dad (of course), family, etc. On top of all of that, this year my kids will be with their mother on christmas day (early) and I will wake up at home alone. Another first. So at lunch today Tandy and I were discussing what to do, she'll bring lunch over and so on. Well, I've always had lunch at mom's for christmas, always, so.......the clouds start to gather. She says that Elizabeth wants to make some cookies too and my first thought is chocolate crackles and that mom won't be making me any this year, and the clouds burst open. That was the end of lunch for me today.

The healing is a learning process too. For example, "cookies" is apparently now a keyword, a grief trigger, and I'll have to take care to be aware of that from now on. I'll be sure to add it to the already long list of sights, sounds, smells, words, and thoughts that trigger strong memory. Soon the storm will wane and then, finally, cease for a time. When it does I'll be a little bit stronger, a little wiser, and I'll be at peace. I miss you mom and dad.

With many tears of sadness and joy,

Craig

Blog the 1st - A Rant

--Begin--

First I will admit that I am behind. At devotional early this week Kerry said, "What do you think of the Congressman-elect (Keith Ellison) that wants to take his oath on the quran?"

Why would he want to do that? Is he a muslim? (Told you I was behind). So, I did some reading up on the subject. Sure enough, our friends in Minnesota have elected a muslim to congress, and he wants to take his oath on the quran rather than the bible. Two good articles to read here and here.

So now there is heated discussion over whether or not he should be allowed to do this. After all, the use of the bible at the swearing in ceremony is only traditional. I think perhaps, now America listen closely, I think we might be missing the point here. Should he swear in on the quran? Does he have the right to? Sure. Should he be sworn in at all? That's the question.

Some quotes from the articles :

A black convert to orthodox Sunni Islam, Ellison spoke to the North American Imams Federation, or NAIF, at the group's Nov. 19 conference in Minneapolis.
His talk flowed into a breakout session listed on the agenda simply as "American Open University," according to the conference program. It turns out the university is a distance-learning center based in Alexandria, Va., and known to local law enforcement as "Wahhabi Online."
Later that day, Ellison met with NAIF's president, Omar Ahmad Shahin, who lectures at the same American Open University. (He also met at the time with New York imam Siraj Wahhaj, an unindicted co-conspirator in the 1993 World Trade Center bombing.) The radical Islamic school trains many of NAIF's more than 150 members, who control mosques across America.
American Open University supports Sharia, or Islamic law. And its founder and chairman, Jaafar Sheikh Idris, has denounced the U.S system of democracy as "the antithesis of Islam" and argued no man has the right to make laws outside Allah's laws expressed in the Quran.
"There is a basic difference between Islam and this form of democracy," he says. "The basic difference is that in Islam it is [Allah's] law as expressed in the Quran and the Sunna that is the supreme law within the limits of which people have the right to legislate.
"No one can be a Muslim who makes or freely accepts or believes that anyone has the right to make or accept legislation that is contrary to that divine law," Idris adds. "Examples of such violations include the legalization of alcoholic drinks, gambling, homosexuality, usury or interest, and even adoption."
Conversely, laws prohibiting polygamy and domestic violence also violate the Quran.
Further, he maintains that no Muslim elected to Congress or the White House can swear to uphold the U.S. Constitution and still be a Muslim.
Also, he asserts that "there is absolutely no compromise: Any belief that contradicts Islam is false."

So, can Keith Ellison, aka Hakim-Mohammed, be an effective American leader, lawmaker, or legislator? He says he is a patriot, his religion says he cannot be loyal to the US Government or to any "man-made" laws created by that government. His religion says that anyone that doesn't think, feel and believe as he does is the enemy. Perhaps Hakim is a lukewarm muslim.

I am a Christian. My purpose? To teach others about Jesus Christ. To spread the Gospel. To go to Heaven when I die and get as many people on that path with me as I can.

Many will persecute me for my beliefs. Many will turn away from me and refuse to believe what the bible says about Christ. Some will listen and just not want to do what is necessary. I PRAY for these people.

Islam's Purpose? To eradicate their enemies. Either by forced inclusion into their religious beliefs or by destruction of non-believers. Mr. Ellison has studied with men that have been linked to terrorist organizations, and to groups that have committed terrorist acts against our nation. Does this sound like the kind of man that we should have working in our government protecting our freedoms? Shame on you Minnesota. Shame on us if we don't do something about it.

The war in Iraq....mixed emotions....but I'm proud of, and pray for, all of our troops, giving their lives in some cases, to fight for my freedom. Freedom is not free, but it is definitely worth fighting for, whatever the cost. Friends, the war is on, and we are in it for the long haul like it or not. But the battleground is not on foreign soil, it is right here at home. The enemy is not far away, the enemy is in our own backyard. They have infiltrated our schools, our businesses, and our government. And as one by one our religious freedoms go by the wayside, their thoughts, and their beliefs creep in that much more. (Prayer is no longer allowed in school, nor is the bible. But, Islam is taught, paganism is taught, evolution is taught in our schools, alternative lifestyles, sexual freedom, the list goes on and on.) Does what I say and feel here make me a Islamophobe? (A new word I've learned recently) No. Why should I be afraid? The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me? Heb 13:6

So, how about it? Do you fear? Will you stand up for God and be counted? Or will you one day wake up in a muslim state (that is their goal) hiding from your oppressors? Mr. Ellison, I am a patriot, but I am first a Christian. Every day before I put on my stars and stripes I put on the body of my Lord and try my best to live for Him. Do not be deceived, God will win this battle. "'As surely as I live,' says the Lord, 'every knee will bow before me; every tongue will confess to God.'" Rom 14:11 Whose side will you be on?

--End Rant--

I'll take my government Allah-carte please.......

Craig

Why am I here?

The answer........42. Bonus points for anyone who gets the literary reference, (no it isn't in my list of favorite books). For those of you that don't know, the answer will be in an upcoming blog. How's that for a hook?

Really though, let's talk turkey for a minute. As in Turkey Day 2006. I wasn't really keen on it this year what with recent changes in the family and all, but I got a wonderful invite from my big brother to eat at his place and thought it might just be the pick-me-up I needed so off I went. Upon arrival I discovered my favorite niece named Audrey prowling around the kitchen amidst several cauldrons of some pretty good smelling Thanksgiving goo. Richard had smoked a bird and it looked and smelled pretty good too, but I digress. Having not seen Audrey in a while I was wont to give her a big hug and have a catch-up chat. I commented that I had read her "border-blog" about her trip to Laredo and thought that it sounded like a very interesting trip. She agreed that it had been interesting, but what might be more interesting is why her Aunts and Uncles all read and comment on the cousins blogs, but don't blog themselves. "Don't you think we'd be interested to read your thoughts and feelings?", she said. Well, no, in fact that had never occurred to me. But, once spoken, I haven't been able to evacuate it from my head since. If only she could overcome her shy, quiet ways and get to the point already!

This is the result. An Aggie blog, random musings of a diehard OSU fan (remember we prefer Agro-American), a techno-geekie Star Wars freak, handy Craig-of-many-trades, and generally speaking, all-around good guy.

Fighting for truth, justice and the american way...............

Peace,

Craig

P.S. Thanks Audrey for the idea. We'll see how it goes. Love you much. C